Has it ever happened to you, that someone criticised you, and as you were listening to them - felt like jumping out of your skin?
Do you typically have an "ego crash" anytime someone offers feedback on where you didn't do that well... and how you could do things better?
Do you feel like you have to defend your position whenever someone tries to correct you?
Well I was a textbook example of this.
Whenever I experienced criticism, I would flame up, defend my actions and try to justify them with logic.
"You just don't understand...you just don't."
How To Use Criticism To Your Advantage
One day we had a large meeting at an insurance company I worked with. The manager stood out and asked if someone was willing to do the sales presentation in front of everybody, to kind of test his or her skills.
He asked if there were any volunteers.
Nobody raised their hand.
I stood up, feeling proud and confident of myself to show everyone how it was done.
I went through my presentation all the way through, and at the end put up a huge grin and smiled at everyone.
"So... how did I do?"
But the feedback was... well... less than pleasant.
And on and on they went, criticism piling one on top of each other.
However, and this is the difference that made all the difference:
Instead of becoming angry, ego-hurt and defensive, I opened up my notebook...
And started writing.
I wrote EVERY SINGLE ONE of those criticism down...
With the intention of turning them into areas I need to work on.
After they were done with the grilling... I thanked everyone for their feedback, and returned to my seat.
One month later.
We had another meeting.
Again, the manager asked the same question - any volunteers?
Nobody raised their hand.
Everyone was laughing under their breath, remembering my flop from last time.
But they didn't laugh for long
When I started my presentation, everyone went quiet.
I hammered it away.
This time a new, improved version of myself, based on the feedback I got.
After I was done, I closed my book, turned around, and looked at them all.
What now, bitches.
Not a sound was heard in the room.
And then suddenly, I heard a clap.
Soon the entire room clapped.
The big lesson
When somebody criticises you, if you're able to let your ego down for just one minute, and actually LISTEN to what the person is saying to you - without getting butt-hurt and defensive, you can LEARN a lot.
But often, we'd much rather be RIGHT than GOOD.
So the lesson here is...
Don't let your need to be RIGHT
Getting criticism is hard... it just doesn't feel good.
Especially if you're a man, that tends to hurt your ego.
But you need to remember that the PAIN you feel because of criticism is TEMPORARY... but the benefits of really taking it in and LISTENING to it can last a LIFETIME.
Whenever you can sacrifice your short term pride and humble yourself down, you will win in the long term.
So what's your "pain point"? Where do you get triggered or defensive when someone criticises you?
And what would happen if instead you could let it go... not take it as seriously, and simply LEARN from it?
Drop a comment down below and let us know!