OMIR DZELILOVIC
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Helping You Live a Better Life

How To Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

9/24/2019

 
Every time I stand in front of a camera to make a video - I feel uncomfortable. 

​Every time I want to go to the gym - I feel uncomfortable. 

Every time I sit down to write a blog post - I feel uncomfortable. ​

Are you the type of a person who will do whatever he or she can to AVOID discomfort?

Are you the type of a person who hates feeling uncomfortable...?

Doing anything worthwhile will require you to step OUTSIDE of your comfort zone.

And in fact, when you think about a goal or something you want to get or have - it is ALWAYS outside of your comfort zone. 

We have a fetish

We like to imagine a fantasy that in order to get what we want, we'll just do couple of things that we feel comfortable with and voila - the result will be here. 

  • We'll do 10 crunches and we'll have a 6 pack the next day.
  • We'll go for a short walk and we'll shed pounds like butter. 
  • We'll buy an online course on how to get rich and we'll get rich next week.

And I've seen people almost want to negotiate with this, like a rich spoiled kid:

"Oh yea, that seems nice, that's something I would do..."

And... 

"No that's not something I feel comfortable doing... so I won't do it..."

Like the goal that you want to accomplish cares what you feel comfortable with or not. 

To get what you want, it is PREDISPOSING that you'll need to do something that feels UNCOMFORTABLE. 

It's like eggs in a cake. 

There's no cake without eggs. 

And in fact, the higher your achievement, the more UNCOMFORTABLE it feels to take the necessary action step. 

The Critical Counter-Intuitive

We humans are comfort seeking creatures. 

All we want to do is be comfortable. 

We want to do as much as we can, with as little effort possible. 

​Our intuitive pull is always doing what feels the most comfortable and easy... and avoid what feels difficult and uncomfortable.

But that often just leads to failure in everything.

  • Failure in relationships. 
  • Failure in business. 
  • Failure in how our bodies look and feel. 
Our intuitive pull will almost always lead to failure.

​- Omir's secret mentor
One of my mentors taught me the concept of COUNTER-INTUITIVENESS.

He taught me that our intuitive feeling is designed to make us fail. 

And that if we want to achieve any kind of success, it almost always involves us going COUNTER to what our intuitive pull tells us to do. 
​
  • So intuitively we are more drawn to sweet and greasy food - but that will lead us to being overweight. 
  • Intuitively we are drawn to have sex with as many partners as we can (I'm talking men here), but that will lead to failed relationships. 
  • Intuitively we are drawn to lay in our cozy couch instead of going to the gym, but that will lead to poor physical condition.  

So if we want any kind of success, it requires us to go COUNTER to what our intuition is telling us to do. ​

I'd like to challenge you on something. 

I'd like you to go do something RIGHT now.

Right now I want you to step into your bathroom, and...

​Take a cold shower.
Every morning I take a cold shower. 

Not because I like how I feel DURING the cold shower, but because of how I feel AFTER. 

Before I'm about to turn the water to cold, I always feel uncomfortable. I'd rather not do it, skip it - and do it tomorrow. 

And when I do turn it, and I feel the cold water running down my spine, I feel uncomfortable. 

It doesn't feel good. 

However, after I come out, I feel great. 

I feel energised. 

I feel ALIVE. 

I'm ready for the day. 

Taking a cold shower taught me 2 things:

  1. Doing what feels uncomfortable never really takes that discomfort away.
  2. The ACT of getting out of your comfort zone however, get's EASIER. 

When I need to make a video.... 

I don't think about it anymore. 

I just turn on the camera and do it. 

When I need to take a cold shower...

I don't think about it. 

I just step in the shower and do it. 

I got USED to it. 

Where are you too comfortable?

So where in life are you becoming too comfortable?

Where are you getting so comfortable that it's dangerous?
​
  • Maybe you're too comfortable in your career, and you're not really pushing yourself enough. 
  • Maybe you're too comfortable with your lack of exercise and physical activity?
  • Maybe you're too comfortable with the lack of reading and learning new things? Maybe the last book you've read was back in the 5th grade when your teacher made you read Shakespeare?

Whatever it is, here's what I'd challenge you to do:

Take a SMALL step.

You probably know what you should do. 

You have that thing in your mind. It's probably constantly popping back to your mind.

Whatever that thing is, go and take a SMALL step towards it. 

If it's rejoining the gym, go pack your gym bag. 

If it's up your reading, go find that book that you left unread. 

If it's finishing a business project, go check out what's left to be done.

There's power in small steps. 

What is your small step?

What will you do?

Let us know below!

How To Make Every Day Count

9/19/2019

 
Can you honestly say, when your head hits the pillow and you are ready to fall asleep - that you did EVERYTHING you possibly could that day?

Can you honestly say, that you've taken FULL advantage of the day?

If the answer is yes, well congratulations. Good job. You're on your way!

But if you have that squeaky voice in your head telling you...

"You could actually do more..."

Then your probably COULD do more. 

My mentor used to say...
Success is the difference between what you COULD have done, and what you've actually done. The smaller that difference, the greater your success.

​- Omir's mentor

So what is your difference?

What is the difference between what you could POTENTIALLY do in a day, and what you actually do?

Are you squeezing full juice out of your lemon?

Brian Tracy, the world-renowned motivational speaker and probably the father of the modern self-development, used to give himself a challenge to finish all the things he had planned for the day...

By NOON that day. 

And I've tried doing the same, and found that I was able to do MUCH more than what I originally thought I could do.

We are capable so much more than what we think. 

When we think we've hit our limits, we've usually only scratched the surface. 

I recently found this meme by David Goggings talking about what's called The 40% Principle.
Picture
The 40% Principle states that when your MIND is telling you that you're done and you can't go any further, you're actually only 40% done - and you have about 60% more in the "tank".

Life is like a brick wall

Picture
This is life.
My dad is a mason. 

Not the kind who control the world, but the actual one, who builds buildings.

And when I was a kid, he would sometimes take me with him to various construction sites, where I'd just see these MASSIVE walls. 

I would always be amazed by the size and might of these walls. 

One day I asked my dad:

"Dad, how do you build a wall this big?"

He looked at me and said:

"One brick at a time son".

One brick at a time

The way you build a wall is not by throwing a bunch of bricks together and hope they fall together.

But the way you build a wall is you LAY 1 BRICK as perfectly as a brick can be laid, and soon you will have a wall. 

Your days are like those BRICKS. 

If you want to have a full week, a full month, a full year or a full life - you don't have to concern yourself with anything else but having a FULL DAY. 

If you take the FULL advantage of a DAY...

Soon that day will turn into a week...

Which turns into a month...

Which turns into a YEAR...

Which then turns into your entire LIFE. 

So take FULL advantage of your 1 DAY. 

Do ALL you can in 1 day and the rest will fall in place. 

Big goals require Big action

I used to be the guy who had BIG dreams... and BIG goals... and BIG everything... 

But when the time came to take action...

I would generally lay in the couch and watch sitcoms. 

My daily actions didn't support my BIG goals and dreams.

I simply wasn't doing enough. 

Then one day I woke up... 

I was broke...

My business was in pieces...

And I just ended a long term relationship because I just couldn't "get my stuff together"...

I was laying in bed, reminiscing on my life.

Thinking to myself:

"Where have I gone so wrong?"

I had all these goals for myself, and my life has gone into a completely different direction.

I felt a heavy burden on my chest of just REGRET. 

And in that moment it hit me:

My life was a direct reflection of all the things I did - and did not do. 

I was paying the price. 

I remembered a quote that I will remember for the rest of my life:
Discipline weighs ounces. But regret weighs TONS.
In life, you will always pay some sort of a price.

  1. You will either pay the price of DISCIPLINE
  2. Or you will pay the price of REGRET

The only difference is that discipline weighs OUNCES... but regret weighs TONS. 

​What price will you pay?
What is your 60% in a day?

How much MORE action could you take in any given day?

What ACTION would you need to take for you to feel satisfied with your day?

Commit to it, and then DO it.

Because I can promise you this:

There is no greater feeling in the world than falling asleep with a gentle smile on your face, exhausted, knowing that you've given your ALL that day. 

How To Stop Being a Perfectionist

9/17/2019

 
Are you the type of a person who needs to have all of his or her i's dotted and t's crossed before taking any action?

Do you sometimes find yourself unable to start, even after you've done all the preparation and planning, because you're just afraid of not having things not turn out exactly perfect?

Well what if I told you that trying to make things perfect before you can start moving is stopping you from making major shifts in your life?

I've learned that there's an image in a perfectionist mind that he or she is trying to accomplish, and it is almost always rooted in making a good impression on OTHERS. 

Or to say it differently, it is rooted in the FEAR of NOT making a good impression. 

Perfectionists are essentially, afraid. 

They are afraid that what they do won't be GOOD ENOUGH... so they keep extending the time to prepare and make everything "perfect".

But I've learned that the fear of something not being good enough almost always comes from the feeling that the PERSON isn't good enough.

And whatever we feel we're lacking on the INSIDE, we will try to create on the OUTSIDE. 
Whatever we feel we lack on the INSIDE, we will try to make up for it on the OUTSIDE. 

Omir Dzelilovic
So a person who feels isn't GOOD ENOUGH... will always try to create things on the outside that are "good enough"...

Thus, becoming a perfectionist. 
Perfectionism is a FABRICATION of our mind. It is actually something that doesn't exist, but we humans created it.

If you take a look, it DOES NOT exist in nature. 
Mark Zuckerberg created this mantra around Facebook that states:

"Done Is Better Than Perfect
- Mark Zuckerberg

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Point being, it's far better to have something DONE and get it out in the world, so the people can give feedback, than it is to try to create something to be perfect from the first try. 

Why?

Because getting it out there will give you FEEDBACK. And feedback is always a good thing. 

If it's positive feedback, you know what you've done right, so you can do it again next time. 

And if it's negative feedback, you know what to change. 

​Feedback gives you the chance to implement changes, so the thing can become more perfect.
Another aspect of trying to make things perfect is in the fear of making a MISTAKE. 

A while back this dude Nassim Taleb wrote a very good book, called ANTIFRAGILE. 
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ANTIFRAGILE by Nassim Taleb
And in it, he talked about how things have to go through a stage of being FRAGILE in order to become stronger, or as he puts it, ANTIFRAGILE. 

As an example, the way aviation develops is by getting those planes off the ground and moving, and when an accident happens, they use it to make the next plane safer. 

However, if they waited and waited and then waited some more to make it perfect before they got people on board and fly... we'd still be crossing the ocean in wooden boats. 

You simply HAVE to get things moving BEFORE they are "perfect" and LEARN from the feedback you receive... and make it BETTER. 
I've once heard a stroy from Tony Robbins that I think can solidify this point.

When General Schwartzkopf assumed command of the United States Central Command in 1988,  he was presented with a difficult decision that needed to be made. 

There were 2 options, A or B. 

They all had this big meeting where the general was presented with all the facts, the pro's and the con's of making both decisions. 

They explained to him that the decision is highly important and will affect the course of the entire military force in the future. 

General listened carefully, and when they were done, he simply said: 

"Do option B."

And was done with it. 

They all looked at him in shock, at how could he make the decision so quick. 

He looked at them and said something in the ways of: "Indecision is worse than making a bad decision. At least we got this out of the way and can move forward."
Indecision is WORSE than making a BAD decision.
At some point, you just have to get OFF the fence and decide... EVEN if the decision isn't optimal, and even if the decision will lead to some sort of a mistake. 

Because it is FAR WORSE to stay stuck on something, than it is to do it and have it not turn out the way you wanted to.

Why?

Well do you remember what we said about feedback?

Making a decision, any kind of a decision will give you feedback. And you'll be able to use the feedback to make the thing better than it was. 

So where are you trying to make things perfect?

Where are you unable to take action because you're afraid of what others will think, that it won't be good enough or that you'll simply make a bad decision that will lead to a mistake?

Whatever it is, remember these 3 things:

  1. Perfectionism doesn't exist. It's something we people made up in our mind. 
  2. Feedback and criticism from people is a GOOD thing, because it will give you the chance to do it better next time. Don't try to make it perfect the first time you go at it. 
  3. Indecision is FAR WORSE than making a bad decision. So get off the fence and start moving!

Comment below on what is an action step you keep procrastinate on because you don't feel it's perfect. Share it with us!

How Small Actions Lead To Big Changes

9/17/2019

 
There is a story of 3 friends. 

The story goes, that these 3 friends were sitting around a camp fire and talking... when suddenly they came up with an idea. 

The idea was that they will do an experiment.

They decided that each of them will do 1 small action every day for a year.

​After that year, they will come back and compare the results to see what happened. 

  • The first friend chose to do 10 push-ups every day. 
  • The second friend chose to read 10 pages of a book, every day. 
  • And the third friend chose to eat 1 cup cake, every day. 

A year later they met and compared their results. 

And they were SHOCKED. 

The first friend who did 10 push ups every day, got into incredible physical shape. 

The second who read 10 pages a day, read a ton of books and was on his way to become a scientist. 

The third one who chose to eat a cupcake every day, well, he became overweight, obese. 

Why?

It turned out that when the first friend got on the floor to do his 10 push-ups, he would do the 10 push-ups and then didn't really feel like stopping there - so he would push for 15, then 20, then 30 and eventually reaching 100 push-ups a day. 

He got into a habit of exercising so he joined a gym and continued to workout there. 

With the second friend, when he was done with the 10 pages, he was pulled into the book and didn't want to stop there... so he kept reading to see what else was in the book. 

After a while, he found himself reading for 2 hours a day, eventually reading a ton of books. 

And the third friend, after eating that 1 cupcake - you guessed it - didn't feel like stopping either, but wanted to try "another one". 

And another.

And then another.


So he would keep eating, until that 1 cupcake became 10. 

He got used to the taste of the sugar and sweetness that he eventually changed his eating habits to a more taste-full food, with lots of carbs and processed food. His eating habits changed so dramatically that he couldn't control himself anymore, and got very obese. 

So what's the point of the story?

The point of the story is that whatever action you do HABITUALLY, no matter how small the start - it will GROW in size and lead to BIG changes. 

So if you want to get in shape, read more books, or even start a new career... you don't have to do THAT MUCH. 

You only have to do a little. 

And that "little" will take on a life of it's own... where it will become "a lot".

So if you want to (finally) get in shape, consider committing to 10 push-ups a day for 3 months, and see where does that lead you to. 

If you want to read more books, maybe start a habit of reading 10 pages of a book every day for 3 months, and notice where you end up. 

If you want to change a career, maybe start researching a new area of work for 10 minutes a day for 3 months, and notice what comes up. 

The key here is to START SMALL. 

And START. 

Do you want to try it?

Do you want to commit to something right now?
​
What will you do?


What I want to do is ________________________ . (ex. get in shape, read 10 books, change my career)

My small action will be: _______________________ . (ex. do 10 push-ups, walk for 10 min, read 7 pages, research online for 13 min)

For how long will you do it? 

I will do it for ____________________ . (ex. 30 days, 90 days, 6 months, 1 year)
​
Leave a comment below and let us know!

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    Omir is a coach who helps people improve their personal and business lives.

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